The kids and I took off 3 days ago for a long weekend in Ohio. I know…dream destination! Several months ago I bought us tickets to attend Alive Music Festival in Mineral City, OH…and guess what? It’s 30 mins from Canton OH, and one of our favorite people lives in Canton…so we got to wrap a meet up with him into our trip. And since we’d be so close, we decided to start our trip in Cleveland.

Despite being tired and out of his element, Tommi was amazing and gave it his all in the pillow fight we had upon returning to our hotel room! poor Jackson was relegated to the fold out bed all weekend and was our bell boy and Tetris car packer.

I don’t remember ever being in Cleveland before, although mom and dad tell me I was there as a kid. I was pleasantly surprised by the city. First of all the traffic was almost non-existent. Strange for a big city. We stayed downtown, just a block from the Cleveland Guardians and the Cleveland Cavaliers stadiums, in a hotel surrounded by the bars and restaurants that Guardian and Cavs fans would fill after a game. So we had lots of options for dinner, but ended up at a BW3’s because Tommi was familiar with it. We had a fun waiter who brought Jackson a little cup of caramel sauce and a little cup of cinnamon sugar for him to dip his cheese curds in. Who would have thought that would be such an amazing combination!

We started our Friday at the Rock and Roll HOF. Again, despite being tired, out of his element and having cramps, Tommi powered through the museum so I could see all the amazing memorabilia-especially the Elvis and MJ stuff! A trip through the West Side Market found us some amazing macarons and cake pops which cheered Tommi right up…and arguably THE best buckeye I’ve ever had! We tried to top the market goodies with some blue raspberry soft serve later in the night at Chubbys in Canton…not quite Kings Island level, but still darn yummy!

Our stay in Canton was highlighted by our visit with Brad

Although I swear he is taller and skinnier than 3.5 years ago when we spent A LOT of time in his office with him, he hasn’t changed a lick and it was like we hadn’t spent any time apart. It was nice to see that he still has legs (haha) and he used them to bike to our visit at a local coffee house. It was super amazing to just sit with him in person and talk about fun things with no therapy involved! And it was super amazing that he left that therapist role and wanted to meet with us while we were there. The hug was pretty stellar too! He was amazed by the kids physical and social growth. He restrained from hugging Tommi when it was obvious he wasn’t ready for that, and although Tommi didn’t make a lot of eye contact at first, he quickly found his comfort level and contributed to the conversation. Tommi made Brad some cream puffs and two flavors of cream and Brad was elated by the Tommi Makes Goodies personal delivery!

He said they’ve been thinking about a return visit back to Indy and if they do it, he’d love to get together then too. And maybe, just maybe, if we return to Alive again next year we can see him then also!

As we drove away, Tommi said what we were all thinking “I’m so glad we got to see him. I love him”

The Alive Music Festival was great-there are so many musical acts from so many different Christian groups. And if you can make the last few hilly, curvy miles of the drive there, the Atwood Lakes Park is a large, beautiful park and the perfect place for a music festival. The kids were pretty much there because I asked them to go with me, but I think they both enjoyed it.

We’re almost back home now. The 4.5 hour dive easy but boring. We’ve had a lot of laughter, game playing and bonding the last four days. Tommi was a rockstar, especially being away from home for three nights and definitely out of his routine. I know the days when Jackson will be available to travel like this with me are numbered, and I’m grateful he wanted to go this weekend. I wouldn’t trade this time for the world.

Easter 2023. I have been looking forward to Easter 2023 since Christmas 2022. I couldn’t wait to experience my first Easter at WRCC. I couldn’t wait to sing the songs Philip put together for us; I couldn’t wait to hear the message from Lance, I couldn’t wait to sit in the sanctuary, the four of us with Stacy and her family. And it didn’t disappoint. The songs spoke to me and watching Philip and the band sing/play those songs on stage, declaring their love and desire for Jesus was so encouraging; Lance hit it out of the park again…and taught me something new again….I never knew WHY Judas was offered 30 coins for Jesus’s life. And sitting with Stacy’s family in the pew with us was wonderful. Jackson was home from Purdue sitting between Todd and me. We were just missing Tommi.

Tommi has questioned God for years. Claiming atheism and then agnosticism, looking into Wiccan and who knows what else. He isn’t comfortable with the “rules” of Christianity, he doesn’t think he knows how to pray the “right way” and he doesn’t think he can be “good enough” for God. Although he does now admit God and Jesus exist, he is back to thinking of Jesus as just a “cool dude” but not someone he can put his faith in. He doesn’t trust most Christian’s outside of our family because there are too many Christians that say they love Jesus, and then act the exact opposite of how Jesus did and would want us to act. That part of his objection I agree with and it makes me sad. I’ve had discussions with people at WRCC, with Jackson and Brad and Tina ….. and their answers at this point are all similar. I know I cannot force my religion on him. And I couldn’t force Easter on him. So I pray for him and pray he finds God and let’s God into his heart. I talk about church with him, the things Lance said, the songs Philip sings… I listen to christian music and he listens with me. I go see christian concerts and he comes along. I watch The Chosen and he watches right along with me. Sometimes all of that boggles my mind, but I just go with it. Far be it from me to dissuade any activity that shines God into Tommi’s life.

Every morning I spend time writing in my thankful/prayer journal and reading my Bible (another new practice for me since attending WRCC) and every day I end my prayers with a BHAP (Big Hairy Audacious Prayer)…another WRCC thing. It’s a prayer that is so big and so audacious that you know it’s the biggest request you could possibly ask God for. I’d say 5/7 days my BHAP is that Tommi go back to being Izzy, that Tommi go back to in-person school, that Tommi stop questioning and start believing. And that Tommi realize he doesn’t have to be perfect, he doesn’t have to have the most beautiful prayer, he doesn’t have to earn Gods love-it’s there, free for the taking. That’s my most common BHAP (my other one is meeting Joel from for King & Country….but God did me one better and gave me a hug from Joel instead)!!! 😂

If you want to read about BHAP’s, Google Big Hairy Audacious Prayers…the passage by Aly Yohn on http://www.Prayersisters.org is a great read.

Her passage ends with this….

“Here’s the bottom line:

When we ask, we receive. When we see answers to prayer, it grows our faith. When our faith grows, we pray bigger and bolder prayers because we grow our image of who God is! And I think God loves those prayers! It says we are beginning to understand the scope of what He can do!

God loves when we pray big, bold, audacious prayers that only He can answer! What will your prayer be today?”

A Facebook post to share to my blog….

A few weeks ago in church, our worship pastor talked about gently grabbing God by the collar and telling him, while holding on tight, that “God-you are my God…we’re doing this together, we’re gonna walk this together…I need you to hold me just as much as I’m gonna hold you…..I have built my house on you….You are with me. You will not fail me.”

I’ve found myself grabbing Gods lapel frequently of late. Holding on to Him. Talking to Him. Telling Him that I need Him and I’m walking this with Him as I literally pray with fists clenched…holding on. Holding on to so many things.

I’ve got you, Lord. And you’ve got me.

You’ve got me, Lord, in the happiness of seeing Jackson thrive and watching Tommi grow. You’ve got me in the amazingness of working everyday in my dream job with my best friend. But even in the midst of this good, grief and sadness keep creeping in. And it makes me quiet and tired, Lord. Todd and I are not entirely on the same page when it comes to transgender issues, treatments and how to best support Tommi. It’s hard to have that fragility between us. It’s heavy to carry and is something that we have to find common ground on. We will need brads help to get there and that time will come when it’s time to sit down and hash it all out. The good, bad, and the ugly…as cliche as that is. It’s also grief and sadness over all of the hate and fear rising up in our government in regards to transgender kids and adults. Why these adults are targeting trans kids… my kid….kids who just want to live their lives…it’s terrifying. They are being singled out and targeted. Their medical care is being compromised. Privacy is being thrown to the wayside. Values and beliefs that are not theirs are being forced upon them. And the risk of them hurting themselves, feeling devalued and dehumanized keeps hurtling upward. I’m scared for Tommis future.

And then there’s the damn trichotillamania that is raising its ugly head again. Tommi never really stopped pulling, but it’s worse right now. He pulls chunks out. And if you know where to look, you can see the bald patches again. It breaks my heart. We did a therapy session with Todd, me, Tommi and Brad this week and it broke my heart to watch him pull during therapy. He was so anxious about our therapy topic and he pulled so much. Broke. My. Heart. Once we got going, the pulling ceased, but I hate that’s his anxiety’s line of defense.

None of this is said to gain pity…I despise pity. It’s said to cleanse my mind and put Tommi in yours. What can you do for someone who is battling sadness, grief, segregation, bullying or unwanted battles? Grab on to our Lords collar and ask Him to help you help them, ask Him to hold you while you find ways to show them that Jesus loves them even in the midst of it. Ask Him to protect those being persecuted, those who are misunderstood, those who are scared and those less fortunate than ourselves.

On the mountains, I will bow my life
To the One who set me there
In the valley, I will lift my eyes to the One who sees me there
When I’m standing on the mountain, I didn’t get there on my own
When I’m walking through the valley I know I am not alone
You’re God of the hills and valleys
Hills and valleys
God of the hills and valleys
And I am not alone

Those lyrics are from a Tauren Wells song-I’ve had it running through my mind for days. Life is a series of hills and valleys. We just pray the hills outnumber the valleys and that we remember God is with us in both. A few weeks ago in church, our worship pastor talked about gently grabbing God by the collar and telling him, while holding on tight, that “God-you are my God. And we’re doing this together, we’re gonna walk this together. And I need you to hold me just as much as I’m gonna hold you. And I’m gonna believe that this moment isn’t going to define me. And I’m gonna believe this isn’t gonna change my life because you are my constant. Whatever is gonna change around me, this is not gonna change me. I have built my house on you. You are with me.” I’m gonna lovingly grab his lapel and hold on to Him. Talk to Him. Tell Him that I need Him and I’m walking this with Him

I’ve got you, Lord. And you’ve got me.

I’ve personally been in a valley most of the past month. Tommi is doing fantastic. Doing well in school, working hard on his baking business (want to place an order-look him up on Facebook!), he’s well medicated and happy. I should be elated. But even in the midst of good, grief and sadness can creep in. And I’ve been full of grief and sadness. Much like losing a loved one to death, I have lost my daughter. I have a son now. Tommi is living his truth and his truth is living life with a new name and pronouns. The difference is, my lost daughter still lives in my home. Still interacts with me on a daily basis. I can still see and hug him. It’s a different grief than any I’ve experienced before and a grief that most people in my circle don’t understand.

It’s no surprise to anyone that in my current mindset I talked to Brad. He talked to me about how you have to grieve to reach acceptance. And that my grief will return over and over again. Which prompted me to ask if grief keeps coming back, how do I ever reach acceptance? His response shook me at first, made my sadness even deeper, but as I’ve played that conversation over and over again I’m starting to get it. The acceptance he’s talking about isn’t acceptance of the end product (Tommi being transgender) but acceptance of the process of grief. Of knowing what I’m feeling. Identifying it. Allowing it. Interacting with it. And knowing how to move with it and through it instead of letting it cripple me. That is my ultimate goal.

Please don’t get me wrong. I support Tommi. I want Tommi to be mentally strong and healthy and to live his truth. And this is his truth. But in living his truth, he has changed mine. I have memories of a little girl with long blonde curly hair who loved dolls and makeup; I have the reality of not being a girl mom; and I had dreams of a future bride in a beautiful dress with Bearbear incorporated into her bouquet. Those are the things I grieve…not Tommi himself.

When we were asked to adopt Tommi, I thought it was to fulfill my desire for a second child. To complete my family. To heal my heart. God gave me Tommi to give Tommi the family he needed. The family who would fight the fiercest battle, support the wildest dream, give him a safe place to land, and teach me what it truly means to be a child of God and to grow and live my faith…in both the hills and valleys.

Brad has a therapy technique that includes identifying the part of you that is suffering or angry or confused or any other host of emotions and painting a verbal picture of that part. He asks me to pull it outside of myself so we can examine it together. Identify its feelings, it’s body language, what it needs. It’s not easy, but he guides me through it or holds space for me to find it and then share it. And for me, because of my faith, he will often ask me to sit with that part of me and see Jesus sitting there with us.

He will ask what does Jesus see? What does his face look like? What are his hands doing? How does he feel toward this part of you? What is his reaction? What do you think he will say to you? What do you need from Jesus in this moment?

Brad has done this exercise several times with me and while it’s difficult each time, it’s also incredibly powerful for me. It helps me see that I’m hard on myself, or scared or feel trapped, but Jesus loves me through it all and he wants to give me compassion, strength, rest. And maybe just maybe give myself some grace.

Last night, Todd experienced this during our session. As I listened and watched, I could see the struggle, and then the peace Jesus placed in his heart through Brad’s lead. It’s amazing to experience. Maybe more amazing to witness. (Even when Todd and Brad both agreed Jesus may have been a curser! No way guys, just no 😂)

If Jesus were sitting beside me this morning, He would see a woman who has set a boundary and found a bit of peace in an old, tenuous relationship; a wife who knows she is not easy to live with but who is learning to lean on her husband in a way that she hasn’t in 20yrs; a friend who loves her people so fiercely; a business owner who is happier in her professional life than she has been in a very long time; a mama bear who is learning to sit back and watch her cubs explore their world in their own ways…knowing she has done her job well with the help of Jesus, Todd and an amazing therapist; and a daughter of God who knows that Jesus is there whenever I need him. I simply have to ask.

I’ve been carrying some new concerns about Tommi recently both of which he brought to me himself looking for help. And instead of trying to find options and peace on my own, I reached out to two men God has placed in my life. When He gives you good resources, you’re a fool not to use them.

I reached out to the lead pastor at WRCC to discuss Tommi’s religious concerns. As an autistic person, belief in God is possibly more difficult than it is for a neurotypical person. Think about it, most autistics are very black and white thinkers. And God is anything but concrete. Tommi can’t see, touch, or hear God, so how can he believe that God truly exists? And he is uncomfortable with the thought that God has control of his life. That God has already written Tommis story. So Tommi has decided that he will acknowledge that God might exist, and that Jesus lived, but he won’t believe that God has any influence over his life. And he will put no faith in Him.

Lance and I discussed Tommi in terms of being adopted, being transgender, being autistic and being agnostic.

He challenged me to do a few things like sharing with Tommi what I’m reading in the Bible. Inviting Tommi to church every Saturday evening so we’re not asking him to go when he’s comfy in bed on Sunday morning. Asking him questions that are not one-word answers. Inviting him to watch The Chosen with me. Asking him what he got out of watching each episode…
He wants me to chat with the special-needs pastor to see if there’s anything he can do to kind of draw Tommi in so that when Tommi does go to church with us, he feels welcome.
He reminded me that Tommi functions more as a 12 to 13 year old biologic girl with girl hormones and girl body things happening, and Tommi‘s right where he should be emotionally and physically. Especially for an autistic person. He made me feel like Tommi was not abnormal in ways that I think of Tommi being abnormal, he told me that in the student ministry there are a lot of kids who profess different sexualities, and some that truly are those sexualities and most that actually aren’t. And he told me that they are all welcome at WRCC. And that he tells the kids who want to be called by a different name that he will respect them and call them by a different name, but that they have to respect him and have one conversation with him about God and the Bible and sexuality
He also told me that I am upholding my baptismal promises to God for Tommi because I pray for Tommi, I share my faith with Tommi and I praise Jesus in front of Tommi. That living my faith is what God wants me to do for my kids. It’s not all about just taking them to the physical church. That it’s much more than that in actuality.
My heart felt much lighter after our conversation.

Today I talked with Brad over another concern Tommi laid in my lap recently. Again, using the people God has placed in my life for a certain purpose.

We talked through the issue and the questions I need to ask. We talked about a plan and boundaries depending on the answers I get. He gave me the tools I was gonna need when I couldn’t even really wrap my head around what we were discussing. He made sure I could ask the questions and knew how to take the answers to form our plan. He made sure I was comfortable with the process and then he turned his focus to my psyche and how he could help me.

He reminded me that Im not taking respite for myself and I have to take care of myself. That Tommi, Todd, Jackson, the practice, they all need me to be healthy and strong and I can’t be that without rest. He instructed me to find some “sweet, solo, quiet, independent respite time” not just “going to the bathroom to sit on the floor for 2 minutes while the dogs and family wait outside the door” I promised to find it, he promised he’d follow up on my promise.

He challenged me to think of the journeys Tommi takes me on, his spirituality, sexuality, gender journeys, as an opportunity, not a curse. That by being on these journeys I have the opportunity to know Tommi in a deeper way, I could view it as an honor, and that I can have some insight and some influence on these key constructs that will shape Tommis entire identity. That’s a positive, beautiful way to shape these paths we are traveling.

In the end, Brad gave me the following thoughts to digest:

“Now I just need to know that you know that you can do this: know it, believe it, do it!

You are capable of saying no

You are capable of leaning on others you trust

You are capable Of hurting others feelings if needed and repairing later

You are capable of prioritizing yourself in a healthy way

You are capable of leaning on God

You are capable of leaning on your trusted resources

You are capable of navigating this as you have all other paths laid before you.”

I know what to do and I will do it. Thanks, Brad! Thanks, God, for the amazing people you place in my life. I am blessed…

Christmas has come and gone and only a few hours are left before we leap into 2023. This year has flown by, mostly a positive year…with growth across the board.

I feel like 2022 has been a great year overall for us as a family. Tommi grew mentally, emotionally and socially. Still in online school, he is more self-driven in his classes (but still has a way to go), has a path for the rest of his high school years (most likely) and a counselor he likes and looks forward to talking to each week. He formed a stronger bond and friendship with Jackson, and his relationship with Todd is growing stronger. He is often my shadow, loves to help me with my puzzles, dinner and loves to come with me to the office when on days he has an appt in Indy. His baking and cooking skills are growing as much as he is. And he’s really enjoying finding some family recipes to make. He has less moments of anger or angst, probably due to medication…but it’s a nice reality. He tried the Depo shots for part of the year but it didn’t work well for him so he disconnected them. He has continued to throw us curve balls and we learn to go with it. And he frequently teaches me things I’d probably otherwise never know. He has become quite the Purdue fan much to our joy! He distanced himself from his birth family this year, but is finding his way back to his birth sibling and that’s a blessing. I am excited to see what Tommi accomplishes in 2023.

It’s Thanksgiving week. And we have so much to be thankful for. My thankful list begins and ends with God. Maybe more so than any other year. Today our pastor spoke about is your spirituality worth imitating…and while I’ve thought it was in my past, I truly BELIEVE it’s much more worthy this year than any other. Being at WRCC has changed my faith. I feel it so much deeper now than I ever have before.

Todd-Todd and I have put a lot of work into our marriage in the last year. He has become my best friend again, and he has been trying so very hard to be a more present, patient and supportive husband and dad. We still have a ways to go and I think we will have to work hard in our marriage forever, but I also feel like most couples do and that it’s worth the work now. We are in a completely different place now than we were last thanksgiving.

Jackson-I’m thankful that he has found his place and his people at Purdue. He’s on the downhill slope with his undergrad degree now, has landed in a good research lab, has a damn good GPA and enjoys his 21 yr old status, but with the protection of God and the help of some good friends, does so safely. He’s living his best life in pep bands and concert band and his new girlfriend. And he still calls me as he’s walking home from a game or walking across campus to his next class just to say “hey.” I am blessed beyond measure by him.

Tommi-wow. In the last year, Tommi has grown so very much. There are days where I look at Tommi’s peers and feel sad or longing in my heart because they all seem to be growing up so much faster than Tommi. But I cannot do that to myself or to Tommi. Tommi has had a lot of growth since last thanksgiving. And Tommi carry’s more heavy baggage then some of his peers. We are traveling roads of transgender, adoption, online school, autism, coping strategies and family learning/loving/living while planning for his future and living in the present. We think he has IBS and we’re struggling with being tired all the time, motivation, age-regression and a period blocker that isn’t blocking the period. It’s a lot. But he is advancing in his baking skills, has a new skill in soap making, has great grades, smiles a lot, laughs more than he ever did before and is taking on more responsibilities. He also has a new counselor, through school, whom he has really accepted and looks forward to talking to each week. Mary is a blessing for Tommi (and me). Overall, I can be nothing but proud of and grateful for Tommi. He’s winning at life right now and I’m thankful for him.

I’m thankful for good health, constant support and good relationships with mom, dad, Tina and Kyle. For AMW, a friend and business partner who makes going to work and running a business together a complete joy and who daily fills my soul with laughter, love, support and problem solving. For Ren who loves me after all these years and who gives me unlimited mental, emotional and spiritual guidance and love. Who isn’t afraid to ask the hard questions and give me a new perspective. For Tosh who fills my bucket with a listening ear, a giving spirit, a loving heart and laughter in the midst of tears or tears in the midst of laughter. For StaceyP who has a Godly spirit worth imitating and is there for prayers, breakfast, amazing hugs and is game for anything our crazy minds dream up. And of course for Brad, who creates a safe space for me through a computer screen, who makes me face the hard things but walks through them with me and encourages me to reach for Todd in those moments where I used to retreat. Brad has changed my life and I thank God every day that he sent us through that red door on 8th street almost 4 years ago.

To all of those friends and family, near and far, who love and support us through ordering food from Tommi makes Goodies, send cards to us, encourage us through social media and pray for us…we are so thankful for all of you as well.

God helps me find a word with each new year to focus on that year. I think my word for 2022 was growth. Personal, professional and family growth. As 2023 approaches, I keep landing on the words faith, forgiveness and forward. Growing my faith, forgiving those I need to move on from and moving forward with progress I’ve started this year.

Happy Thanksgiving week to all of you. If you need people, food, prayer-reach out. We are here for all of you. As we step into the holiday season, stop on a daily basis and take the time to breathe and appreciate your world.

Tommi’s artsy side has taken on another new hobby. Soap making! Watching soap making videos is an anxiety release for Tommi and he’s decided he wants to try his hand at it. Alright! Let’s do it! He’s done so much research. Read, watched videos, had me watch videos and take notes. It amazes me sometimes when Tommi gets super focused on something how quickly he can take in and be knowledgeable about something! He’s ready and excited! Maybe we can make some Christmas presents! Wish us luck!

In other news, Tommi and his school therapist have decided that Tommi should enroll in INCAs sister school, INCC where Tommi would have the opportunity to take career preparedness courses his Sophomore year and be in their culinary career center at J. Everett Light 1/2 days his junior and senior years of high school. He would graduate with both his HS diploma and a culinary certificate and would be ahead of the game for culinary school. Tommi is very excited at this prospect and so are Todd and I. Pursuing Tommi’s passion and being 1/2 day in-person would be wonderful. We will finish out his freshman year at INCA and enroll in INCC next year. Say some prayers on this.

And I am pushing all of us out of our comfort range again by deciding I want to go on a mission trip. I have thought about it previously, going with a medical team as an audiologist, testing hearing and fitting hearing aids in third-world countries. But since beginning to attend White River CC, the opportunities for mission trips with them, teaching people about my God, has turned the little whisper of an idea into a full blown shout. Why is this pushing my family out of its comfort zone? Because, as Brad put it so bluntly last night in therapy, me desiring to do this in and of itself shows huge personal growth, but someday leaving for this trip for 7-10 days, means I will have to give up my control. I have to 100% trust Todd to take care of kids, pets, and house. And that might be the best damn thing I could do for myself, Todd and Tommi. Keep that in your prayers too.

Happy November, everyone!

It’s been about 6 weeks since I’ve posted on the blog. A lot has happened, but I couldn’t find the headspace to sit and write. So I’m at the office this afternoon waiting on a late patient and I think I can let it all flow out of me in this quiet…

A couple weeks ago, Tommi started talking about how he hopes there’s someone who can take him places and mow his yard and help him order at a restaurant when I’m gone because he’s still gonna need help and he’s pretty sure jackson won’t have time. Oh shooters, I wasn’t ready for that. It was just something that ran through his head in the moment and he simply stated the thought. He wasn’t upset or anxious…he was just genuinely curious. But it made me think. And made me realize that we needed to update our will. And I need to get back on the fitness bandwagon. So I recommitted to my R3 Fitness program and Todd and I had a consult with a lawyer and Tommi is at least now taken care of financially when we pass and he won’t get it in one lump sum that he would spend on Etsy in 10 minutes flat. 😂

Tommi is still doing well. Started 9th grade with INCA again this year, and is definitely taking more responsibility for his schoolwork. This first quarter, Tommi only has 3 classes, and he does 2 of them during the day while I’m at work. The 3rd class – Algebra 1 – I “teach” him. There’s a reason I’m an Audiologist, not a math teacher, but we’re holding our own so far. I’ve learned how to learn the lessons myself, then teach Tommi how to do the math in a way that I’m not doing the actual math homework. We’ve had frustration, but no anger and no walking away, so I call that a win! He has a school counselor this year who he has to meet with weekly. She’s a LMFTA therapist, contracted out to the school and she’s really good. Tommi has met with her 3 times, via zoom, and Tommi really likes her. That is an answered prayer.

Tommi’s hair is growing like wildfire! He does still pull, and if you know the spots to look you will see where he pulls, but it’s only in a couple spots, and they’re not noticeable unless you’re really looking, another win. He can actually part his hair if he wants….although he usually just wears it standing straight up! There are some little curls starting in the back, but everywhere else it’s pretty straight.

He’s still trying to do his baking business. Hasn’t had many orders, but still practicing non-stop and starting to try some dog treats! We hired him at Meridian Audiology for our physician marketing gifts and he made some amazing cake balls and thumbprint cookies for the physicians we visited in August. He’s making our September gifts as well – already planning on what he’ll do for those! It’s a good gig – the people who hired him treat him very well and pay him more money than he’s ever had (that’s not really saying much!).

Tommi went to the first Purdue Football game of 2022 with us. It was a late one – and a long one – but he stood when I stood, he clapped the school song, and he had a pretty enjoyable time. He even asked for a Purdue tshirt! We may win him over yet. He went to game number 2 also! Even got and wore PU Gameday bibs! I think we’ve got him! 🖤💛

He tends to be outside waiting on me to get home every afternoon, likes to go on every errand or trip I make after work or on the weekends – likes being in the same room with me. I love his love, his humor, hearing his insights and his questions. Somedays it really ramps up my compassion fatigue, but I’ve also learned how to step away and take a few minutes for myself.

Tommi is missing Jackson, but this transition of Jackson heading back to Purdue was the smoothest we’ve had to date. When jackson calls, Tommi makes sure to get a hello into the conversation. And it melts my heart. I thank God for the love they now share.